Where Do You Shine?

Another blog post brewing in my mind, another challenging personal decision of, "which blog does this really belong to?" I'm going with this one, although it really could work just as well on my other one.

Anyway...

I like to consider myself a reader. Although, if you look at the other women in my book club, you'll find that I'm, by far, the slowest, least prolific reader of them all. I often have trouble getting through the one book each month we're "assigned" to read - especially if I don't find it completely interesting. My co-clubbers, though... these awesome ladies can not only make it through this one book, but several others as well, all before we meet again each 4 weeks or so. Amazing. I don't see how they can do it.

But... this last month, I must say I've done pretty well for myself on the reading front. Our club meets next Friday evening and I'll be able to report on not only the assigned book, but a couple others as well. Yes, it took me a few false starts to find some books with characters I was truly interested in learning more about. But when I did, I read their stories fast and furiously, excited to learn more about their worlds and what drama they'd find themselves in as the pages kept turning.

Funny thing about favorite books. You love them so much that you can't put them down, which only makes your time with these wonderful stories that much shorter. Boo.

Anyway...

It's occurred to me that my favorite books are those that make me think. What is happening here? Why does the main character think one thing is true, while the others think she's crazy? What would life be like if this was really how the world worked? How would I feel if I was in this same situation? When I love a book, I actually find it really difficult to stop thinking about it and I often bring my Hubby and Sweetie into the fictional world, telling them the story and using them to either bounce plot resolution ideas off of or ruminate with them about this newly created "what if" situation of "what if our world was really like the one that I'm reading about?" Thankfully, Hubby's a reader too, and Sweetie loves stories, so they're both good for some ideas and don't seem to mind terribly much when I start blabbering on about "my book" every night.

Currently, I'm reading a truly great "what if" book. It's called The Illumination* and it's about how, one day, all the pains of the world just start to glow with light. You cut your finger? Yes, it will hurt just as it ever would. But it also shines a light from within it. You have a headache? Your forehead glows with the light of the pain. And let's hope you don't bump your nose right around Christmas time or everyone will start calling you Rudolf.

This is really a fascinating concept, if you think about it. Kids start hurting themselves on purpose just to see this or that body part shine with the pain. Abused women and children can no longer hide their bruised and battered bodies under layers of clothing - their pain shines through. Doctors and emergency workers need to wear sunglass from all the intensely bright light they're subjected to every single day. In fact, doctors start treating emergency patients based on how brightly their injuries shine. "Oh, you're beaming like a beacon - come right this way! You over there glowing more dimly in the corner - you can wait a bit." No pain in the world can be hidden. You got painful hemorrhoids? Sorry, my friend, but people are gonna know about it. It's just the way it is now.

So, doing what I do, I started telling Hubby and Sweetie about this book. I told them how I, since reading this story, have really started to pay more attention to how my body feels. If I was glowing with pain right now, where would my light shine? Well, my legs have been crossed for a bit, and actually that kind of hurts a little. So I'd probably have a soft glow going on behind my right knee. And my lower back, as usual, hurts right now - but not as badly as other times. It too would be a low-light shine. But at it's worst? Yeah, my back would be shining with the best of 'em. What about you?

Both Hubby and Sweetie thought this concept was just as interesting as I did, and they too were able to really "feel" their bodies at that moment and pinpoint where a light would be shining for them - if at all. And not only that, but how brightly that light would shine. From Hubby's ever-tired feet to the on-going dull headache he's seemed to have of late, he was able to say what would, or actually really wouldn't, be too bright of a light. And Sweetie - she of the "I'm great every day!" attitude - offered up that her lips, at that moment, would shine a bit because of how chapped they were. And later after dinner? She even said that, if we actually did live in such a world where our pains lit up, we'd probably be able to see that she had a bit of a tummy cramp right then from the light coming from her middle.

Huh. What a great tool. For us all, really, to honestly take notice of our bodies and how we're feeling. But for Sweetie especially, I think. Instead of us asking her every once in awhile how she's feeling, only to receive her usual "great!" response - and us never really knowing what "great" means for her... we can ask her "where, if anywhere, would you shine right now?" For the last couple days, I actually haven't even had to ask this. Sweetie offers up for herself, "I'd be shining right here (points to her just-pinched thumb as she pulls it away from the offending door before too much injury occurs) if our pains lit up."

I told Sweetie how great I think this new way of thinking about pain really is, especially for her. I pointed out to her how, if that was the world we lived in, she could no longer pass off her dismissive "I'm great! I'm fine!" We'd be able to see quite plainly for ourselves just how true, or not, that statement really is by how much, and where, her body glows. I told her I think that's what I'm going to do from now on. No more asking her how she is. From now on, I'll ask her, "Are you shining anywhere? Where do you shine?"

Of late, I really do think Sweetie's doing pretty great. Her reduced dosage of her herbal supplements has done nothing to change her daily health for the worse. 1 month down, 2 more months to go. Hopefully she'll stay just as symptom-free as she's been until that next doctor appointment. Here's hoping.

But if ever she does have something to report - or I suspect she's not feeling all that well - at least I'll be able to know a little better what exactly it is that's got her feeling yucky. All I'll have to do is ask her that great new question - "where do you shine?"

------------------

(*Book Club friends - As much as I recommend this book, please hold off on reading it now. It may very well be my next pick when it's my turn to choose again. I've said a lot about the premise here, but there's so much more to it too. It'll be a great read for us, I'm sure.)